
Today, I want to discuss a topic that has been gnawing at me for quite some time. You know how everyone has that one thing that irks them beyond measure? For some, it’s the sight of a spider scuttling across the floor. For others, it’s the endless queues at the grocery store. But for me, the bane of my existence is none other than litchis. Yes, you read that correctly. Litchis, the fruit that many herald as the epitome of summer refreshment, are my personal nemesis.

The Alien-like Appearance
Let’s begin by addressing the elephant in the room: the appearance of litchis. I understand that beauty is subjective, but let’s be honest here. Litchis look like miniature, spiky extraterrestrials. When you hold one in your hand, it’s as if you’re cradling a tiny alien life form. The spiky, reddish skin gives it an otherworldly aura that I find unsettling, to say the least.
/image
The Textural Dilemma
Once you muster the courage to peel away that intimidating exterior, what are you left with? A squishy, translucent blob that resembles a fruity jellyfish. The texture is so off-putting that it feels like you’re eating something that should be floating in the ocean, not sitting in a fruit bowl on your kitchen counter.
The Taste: A Rollercoaster of Confusion
Now, let’s talk about the flavour profile of this perplexing fruit. Is it sweet? Is it tart? It’s as if the litchi itself can’t make up its mind. Every time I take a bite, my taste buds are thrown into a whirlwind of confusion. It’s like the fruit is experiencing an identity crisis, and it’s taking me along for the ride.
The Seed: A Monumental Letdown
Ah, the seed. The gigantic, inedible core that occupies an absurd amount of space within the fruit. Imagine watching a film where the main character appears for a mere ten minutes. That’s the level of disappointment I experience when I encounter a litchi seed. It’s as if the fruit is playing a cruel joke, offering a morsel of flesh and then presenting a seed that’s almost as large as the fruit itself.
The Watermelon Alternative
For those who argue that litchis are refreshing and juicy, I present to you the watermelon. A fruit that is not only hydrating but also devoid of any confusing flavours or gigantic seeds. It’s sweet, it’s satisfying, and it doesn’t look like it belongs in a science fiction film.
The Health Benefits: A Moot Point
Yes, I’m aware that litchis are packed with vitamins and nutrients. But let’s not forget that there are plenty of other fruits that offer similar health benefits without the accompanying drama. Give me an apple or an orange any day—fruits that are straightforward and drama-free.



If litchis are your fruit of choice, I salute you. You’re welcome to my share. But for me, I’ll stick to fruits that don’t leave me questioning my life choices—fruits that are confident in their identity and don’t look like they’re auditioning for a role in a sci-fi movie.