Creating a God: The Holy Order of The Claw

There is a new religion gaining traction that you might not have heard about as yet, one that is actively creating its own visible God to worship, called The Holy Order of The Claw.  They are a rapidly growing religious order dedicated to The Clawed One, The Holiest of Crustaceans, and the Molter of Life. Yes, a Lobster.

Currently, they are welcoming people from all walks of life to join their order, diversity and inclusion are key. At the same time, they are a community-based organisation that actively tries to make the world around us a better place, for Lobsters.

So what exactly is The Holy Order of The Claw, and what does it have to do with Lobsters?

Their aim is to create a lobster god over generations by giving a lobster help and assistance to create ideal conditions to keep growing. Lobsters don’t die of old age like us, and therefore there is no theoretical limit to their size…

Through generations of assistance, they can technically create a living breathing being to worship right?

Their Facebook page dubbed plans to create and worship our leviathan lobster god.’ already has over 128 thousand followers from all walks of life, ready to dive into the next steps and to learn and grow with the community that is being developed.

The about page for the official Facebook page states the following: Lobsters do not stop growing and do not die of old age. They die when they become too large to properly molt. We are going to take a lobster, help it molt its shell over several generations, and create a leviathan god. Here we will plan our God’s birth and rise to divinity. Their acolytes are at risk and must be protected. Any creature with magic blood is obviously descended from the gods.

They also have a website www.holyorderoftheclaw.com where you can read up on their confessions, holy mass, and also the very important 8 ‘Holy Clawmandments’.

  • The Clawed One, The Holy Shellfishness, is a genderless being. They are above our archaic constructs of gender. Any genderization of The Clawed One is a sin.
  • Treat everyone how they would like to be treated.
  • Love thyself.
  • Treat and love everyday, knowing that our lives are free from rubber band restraints
  • Shells must be discarded when they are no longer useful, metaphorically as well as physically.
  • All followers must recycle and work to cut down on pollution in order to honor the lobster god.
  • No consumption without ceremony. If thou shall choose to consume lobster, a piece must be left out for our lord. As lobsters consume lobsters, so too are we permitted to follow in the god Lobsters foot steps. Give thanks and offerings, whenever lobster is consumed. 
  • No raw broccoli on Thursday.

Even though they are not an officially registered religious organisation (yet), the internet has been abuzz with what this could potentially mean. Mainly a breeding ground for jokes, and memes (not giant-sized lobsters!)

But with every religion, you need just one or two people to believe, that is how it starts. A dream, a story, a vision, and a community.

Who knows what will be next for these young holy order of the claw members. However, I definitely wish them all of the best on their journey for their leviathan lobster god.

Stay Curious, Stay Blessed!

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