1000 Hilarious Ways To Say Penis
Unveiling a list of the quirkiest, most hilarious nicknames for your penis. From popular to downright eyebrow-raising, discover the many ways to refer to your 'buddy down under'.
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Hold onto your hats and maybe your pants! Whether you call it the “Sticky Taster,” “Captain Winky,” or even “Mr. Sniffles” (who came up with that one?!), if you’ve got one, you know things are about to take a wild and wacky turn. Some proud ‘Penis’ owning individuals have pet names for their little (or not so little) buddy down under. Maybe it’s a self-coined moniker, a popular slang, or just a bizarre exclamation someone once blurted out during an unexpected trouser snake sighting.
Now, I took one for the team and dove deep, very very deep, into the wild web. And let me tell you, typing “Penis” into a search bar? It’s like opening Pandora’s box of well… PENIS! I’ve seen things, folks. Things that can’t be unseen. I might need therapy or at least a long nap. But hey, I did the dirty work so you could stay pure and innocent. All in the name of uncovering the most hilarious and eyebrow-raising nicknames for those midnight joy-riders and their Tinder and Grindr escapades! ?
So what do i have for you? 1000 ways to refer to the guy down under, the spitting cobra of sorts… Whoa, 1000 names? YES, That’s a lot of creativity and probably a few chuckles! I’m ready to get right into this epic list of trouser snake titles. And while I don’t have personal preferences, I’m sure I can highlight some that might tickle the human funny bone. So let’s read about some more names for your Johnson…
(Take a look at my list of 1000 Hilarious Ways to Say Vagina here)
- Groin Gouger
- Pork Whistle
- Purple Pneumatic Drill
- Choad
- Joystick
- Peen
- Tubesnake
- Spitting Cobra
- Schlort
- Plonker
- Shrinky Dink
- The D
- Womb Broom
- Vagina Miner
- Mr. Sniffles
- Taco Warmer
- Vlad the Impaler
- Vomit Rod
- Clam Hammer
- Mutton Dagger
- Gash Mallet
- Sludge Pump
- Uncle Reamus
- Woody Womb Pecker
- Lincoln Log
- Cervix Crusader
- Piss Pump
- Cheeky Monkey
- Puff the One-Eyed Dragon
- Dinky
- John Thomas
- Peeper
- Thrill Drill
- Pink Tractor Beam
- Yoo-Hoo
- Russel the One-Eyed Wonder Weasel
- Dome Head
- Captain Winky
- Agent Hosepipe
- Squinty Blow-pop
- Old Man Drizzle
- The Goods
- Wrinklebeast
- Elevator
- Private Washington Monument
- The Pendulum
- Gods Pinkey Finger
- Puking Flesh Weasel
- Tadpole Torpedo
- Sin Stick
- Rolling Pin
- Satan Scepter
- Temptation Turtle
- Fat Kidney
- Magic Pipe
- Cupids Arrow
- Drizzle Spout
- Love Lure
- Satan’s Shovel
- Musky Man Candy
- Tickle Badger
- Mr. Missile
- Man Telescope
- Mr. Happy
- Lap Lizard
- Friction Whistle
- Atomic Turtle
- Mr. Bojangles
- Boney Macaroni
- Firecracker
- Dirty Dowsing Rod
- Baby Leg
- Pocket Shot Glass
- Spring-Loaded Nose-Slapper
- The Ugliest Flower
- Erector
- Fuck Piston
- Finger Food
- Thermonuclear Rod
- Fountain of “Youth”
- Twinkie
- Denim Narwhal
- Hershey Bar
- Submarine
- Loveworm
- Laugh Stick
- Flex Rod
- Musk Handle
- Fuck Geyser
- Joker
- Suppository
- Apple Headed Beef Basher
- Goat Bumper
- A Bad Place To Snort Coke
- Puff Stick
- Center Sweat Stain
- Sergeant Slaughter
- Tirpitz
- The Middle Muffin-Top
- The Business End
- It
- Bald Butler
- Bathtub Eel
- Blood Sausage
- Dearest Member
- Fiddle-Bow
- Giggle Pin
- Gut Stick
- Poo-Flicker
- Dangus
- Bean Tosser
- Bone-Horn
- Gristle
- Jigger
- Joy Knob
- Life Preserver
- Gash Hook
- Mr. Clean
- Nimrod
- Pink Pencil
- Live Sausage
- My Body’s Captain
- Pisser
- Quickening Peg
- Red Cap
- Scepter
- Tickle-Gizzard
- Willie
- Cupids Torch
- Quiver Steak
- Stump
- Hunchback of Notre Dame
- Milk Straw
- Acorn Top
- Yogurt Truck
- The De-Virginator
- The Monolith
- Doughnut Holder
- Beefy Ent
- Thunder Piston
- Spam Obelisk
- Chum Rod
- Jumbotron
- Man Puppet
- Muscle Bound Shit Wrecker
- Genghis Cock
- Baby Batter Blaster
- Red Hot Toy
- Mr. Hornbag
- Little Engine That Could
- Inflatable Poo-Jabber
- Admiral Winkey
- The Intruder
- Bean Stalk
- Hangy-Downy
- Jimmy Dean
- Leaning Tower
- Bed Snake
- Dr. Feelgood
- Wiggly Pogo-Stick
- Pee-Wee Herman
- Beard-Splitter
- Purple Turkey Baster
- Sour Cream Rifle
- Sweet Meat
- Blue Steel
- Blood Slug
- Salty Drizzle-Stick
- Cum Gutter
- The Giving Tree
- Bow-Legged Swamp Donkey
- The Ramburglar
- Scepter of Sordid Affairs
- Regurgitator
- E.T.’s Finger
- Meaty Maelstrom
- Trickle Torpedo
- Blowpop
- Wrinklestiltskin
- Spray Stick
- Pringle’s Tube
- Sriracha Dripper
- Choady McMeatstick
- Veiny Straw
- Drippy Paintbrush
- Angry Buffet
- The Eviscerator
- Tootsie Pop
- Holy Grail
- Tremble Wand
- The Last Unicorn
- Fuck Slug
- Transformer
- Fat Stick
- Flesh Hawk
- A Shitty Vibrator
- Flamingos Beak
- Dough Boy
- Spice Shaker
- Pleasure Bud
- The Spanish Inquisition
- Bumble Muffin
- Crotch Paddle
- Pool Stick
- Genetic Faucet
- Legwarmer
- Drill Sergeant
- Toucan’s Beak
- The Hole-Hungry Crotch Crocodile
- General McSexy
- Antenna With Shitty Reception
- Dunce Hat
- Lust Torch
- Stink Twizzler
- Piss Dispenser
- One Flower Bouquet
- Laser Splitter
- Crunk Hammer
- Pink Kink Handle
- Floppy Meat Balloon
- Jenga Tower
- Hammy Toothpick
- Spelunker
- Goomba
- Vein-Bow
- Grunty Grunty Thrust Thrust
- Coiled Serpent
- Inside-the-Pants-Belt
- Snow Globe
- Flesh Auger
- Sticky Ass-Spackler
- Giggly Goblin
- Pork Lance
- Man Missile
- Cock
- Dick
- Dangle
- Dong
- Schlong
- Johnson
- Cannon
- Flesh Flute
- Hairy Banjo
- Knee Buckler
- Throat Scraper
- Ding-Dong-Dangly
- Toilet Parts
- Pee-Pee
- One-Eyed Yogurt Thrower
- The Troll
- Purple-Headed Man Monster
- Pecker
- Weiner
- Pressure Washer
- Inchworm
- Tool
- Pussy Pounder
- Bat
- Pelvic Popsicle
- The Oncoming Storm
- Sonic Screwdriver
- The Whip
- Assault Rifle
- Pork Blade
- Beef Hammer
- Mjolnir
- Hulk’s Fist
- Milk Dripper
- Man Drain
- Excalibur
- Gong-Ringer
- My Manly Popsicle
- Meat Stick
- Pleasure Pogo
- Cum Cannon
- Panty Poker
- The Grand Finale
- Banana
- Ol’ Drippy
- Red Headed Throb Monster
- Thunderstick
- Hotrod
- Dongmongulous
- Lightning Catcher
- Thruster
- The Ol’ Aim N’ Shoot
- Salty Steve
- Manly Cigar
- Pearl Jamer
- Baby-Maker
- The Oscar Meyer Weenie
- Battle Ax
- The Alpha
- The Omega
- Blaster
- Shaft
- Furry Snake
- Escape Rope
- Symphony of Regret
- Droopy Baguette With Cheese
- Greasy Fish
- Throbknob
- Philly Cheese-steak
- Pleasure Machine
- The Male Reproductive Organ
- Dirty Mushroom
- Pistol
- My Best Friend
- Slytherin
- Red Rocket
- Fanny Slapper
- Woman Maker
- Winkey Badger
- Veiny Cucumber
- The Bulge
- Cattle Prod
- Third Leg
- Crotch Rocket
- The Key to the Lock
- Crotch Slapper
- Pork Steeple
- Trouser Snake
- Nose In the Beard
- Cucumber
- Lil’ Winkey
- Jack in the Box
- Man Bits
- Dead Eye Sam
- Sad Larry
- Dirty Ice Cream Cone
- Electric Boogaloo
- Ice Pick
- Meat-hose
- Pipe Cleaner
- Piddle Fiddle
- Pleasure Rod
- Love Shaft
- Sexy Suppository
- Vesuvius
- The Reason I Have All of Those Children That I Hate
- Milk Hose
- Dangle Blaster
- Floppy Fish
- Man-Motor
- Woman-Slayer
- Bungee Smuggler
- Package
- Flesh Saber
- Eye Dropper
- Lumpy
- Dipstick
- 00-Dong
- Mr. Meowsworth
- Gonadulous
- Grave Digger
- Suckshroom
- Tallywhacker
- Handy Hammer
- A Real Love Handle
- Masturbation Motor
- Long N’ Girthy
- One Color Rainbow
- The Spreader
- Power Point
- Terms and Conditions
- Hairy Pen
- Wankhammer
- Juicy Dribbler
- Rabid Dog
- Dongzilla
- Dongasaurous Rex
- Filler
- Jelly Roll
- Cream-Filling Cannon
- The Lone Warrior
- Front Tail
- Fleshy Bong
- A Bad Seat
- An OK Seat
- A Damned Good Start
- Target
- Sweatsicle
- Quiver Bone
- Man Clit
- Jiggly Wiggly
- Man Nugger
- Half of a Good Time
- The Devils Own Microphone
- Juicer
- Wang
- Diddle-Whistle
- Six Inch Soldier
- Lipstick
- Stay Pufft
- Ol’ Faithful
- Pop-Tart
- Salty Geyser
- Flop Trout
- Pork Pipe
- Phallus
- The Beast
- Pope of Pork
- Titty-Tickler
- Soft Knife
- “Deep Impact”
- Pecker-Corn
- Droopy Dog
- Crotch Compass
- Dirty Jammer
- Voldemort’s Missing Nose
- Seamen Spitter
- Crotch Mounted Regret Cannon
- Dirty Thermometer
- Toe Scratcher
- Long Dong Sliver
- Ass Injector
- Adult Erector Set
- Lord Commander Groinulous
- Little (Insert Your Own Name Here)
- Fleshy Pacifier
- Meat Straw
- Cherry Popper
- Kaleidoscope of Pleasure
- Pink Floyd
- Blood Balloon
- Italian Stallion
- Mangler
- Drumstick
- Slippery Salmon
- Fuckstick
- Suckstick
- Count Dickula
- Lord Commander of the Southern Forces
- Lethal Injection
- Crucidix
- Beef bottle
- Crank
- Whoopi-Maker
- Corn On The Cob
- Lady Gag-you
- Hot Beef Injection
- Slammin’ Salmon
- Shagger
- Handle
- Meat Storm
- Fucknado
- Buttery Slopstick
- Captain Suck
- Source of the Local Syphilis Outbreak
- Urchin
- Succulent Sausage
- Meat-Lolly
- One Eyed Man
- Clit-Clapper
- Moses
- Wolly Manmoth
- Veiny Girth
- Growth
- Goldenrod
- Furry Fuzz-Fucker
- Organic Sausage
- Natural Second Nose
- Festering Growth
- Mandana
- Man Horn
- Honky-Honky
- The Elder Wand
- My Rifle
- The Fibonacci Sequence
- Holy Grail
- Tripod
- Colgate
- Ineffective Scope
- Teeth Whitener
- Whistle
- Warp Pipe
- Purple Warrior
- Erected Evolution
- Vaginal Sunrise
- Clitoral Plunger
- Buckeye
- Browneye Stinger
- Boa Constrictor
- Colon Plugger
- Web Slinger
- Poo Miner
- Queef Creator
- Hornets Sting
- Spikey-Back Turtle-Dragon
- Shroomy
- Cake Penetrator
- Laser Pointer
- Sock Stiffener
- Bullship
- The Speculum
- Mighty Blade
- Curved Majesty
- Ganker
- D-Battery
- Starscream
- Bazooka
- Bush Snake
- Master Sword
- Pants Boomerang
- Monkey
- Upright Base
- Bunker Buster
- Deep Digger
- Smile Spreader
- A Cursed Relic
- Wiggle Worm
- X-Rated Toothpick
- Tic-Tac
- Mayonnaise Factory
- Thunderhorse
- Vaginal Speculum
- Tube of Mascara
- Crack Assailant
- Stick of Sexy Dynamite
- Crying Cyclops
- Sock Cruster
- Ol’ Fisty
- Second Brain
- Adrenaline Shot
- Herp Head
- Little Fucker
- Adventure Worm
- Corkscrew
- Bad Bottle of Wine
- Flaming Face Slapper
- Rage Burrower
- Rock Em Sock Em Robot
- Thunderous Whip of Transcendent Fury
- Head of Public Relations
- Diamond Cracker
- Loch Ness Monster
- Passion Twizzler
- Back Door Pass
- Filthy Spelunker
- Slippery Snake
- Half a Necklace
- Eighth Wonder of the World
- Fury Monkey
- The Conqueror
- Showerhead
- Colossus of Rhodes
- Sex Reactor
- Lust Powered Coat Hanger
- The Blood God Atrofax
- Weedle
- Curved Candle
- Crotch Slayer
- Devourer of Worlds
- Life Sprinkler
- Golden Spigot
- Fuckarina of Time
- Old Frothy
- Bulge Sculptor
- Pixy Stick
- Silk Snake
- One Color Paintbrush
- Gandalf’s Staff
- The Zipper-Caged Creature
- Booby-Basher
- Bologna Bandit
- Trout-Trident
- Tent Pole
- Slippery Love Dolphin
- Giraffe Neck
- Grunt Rod
- 9-Iron
- The Albino Cave Dweller
- Hymen Hammer
- 2X4
- Beef Scarf
- Battering Ram
- Groot
- DNA Catapult
- Earthworm Jim
- Elephant Trunk
- Iguana
- Face Hugger
- Midget Chaser
- Honey Dripper
- Hot Pocket
- The Riddler
- Magic Mountain
- Metapod
- Junk In the Jeans
- Key Part of the Male Reproductive System
- Kickstand
- Lambshank
- Mount St. Helens
- Mustache Cleaner
- One Rung Ladder
- Squirtle
- Rainstick
- Hairless Ferret
- Lance of Love
- Railgun
- Weapon of Ass Destruction
- The One Headed Hydra
- Mt. Everest
- Monkey String
- Little Guy
- Tan Banana
- Sparkle Bolt
- Third Eye Sam
- Toothpaste Tube
- Glue Stick
- Main Drain
- Daddy’s Hand Gun
- Mighty Unicorn Horn
- The Whomping Willow
- Monument
- The One Balloon That Doesn’t Match
- Thick Brick
- Rainbow Maker
- Rip Van Winkey
- Twiddle Rhombus
- Saucy Noodle
- Sting Ray
- Chasm Closer
- The Really Big Lebowski
- Redwood
- Uncle Touchy’s Happy Stick
- Girth Rocket
- Velvit Python
- An Upright Citizen
- Thrill Drill
- Wind Waker
- Blunderbuss
- The Last Action Hero
- Lifeline
- Heat Seeking Moisture Missile
- Gollum
- Gleaming Love Blade
- The Fate of Many
- Eiffel Tower
- Dude Piston
- Drooling Badger
- Carnage Wurm
- Buckshot
- Ham Dragon
- The Dark Knight
- Shake-Weight
- Angry Llama
- Fury Faucet
- A Very Painful Seatbelt
- Apple Head
- Sham-WOW!
- Under the Covers Crusader
- Thrill Mill
- Father of Dragons
- Pump Action Shotgun
- Trans-Pantslantic Cable
- Sweaty Suck-Stick
- Mentos and Coke
- Little Dovahkiin
- Mightiest Tree In the Forest
- Splooge Saber
- Flesh Root
- Ham Branch
- Spunk Catapult
- Smokeless Peace Pipe
- Charcoal Stick
- One String Guitar
- Twig and Berries
- Sticky Cigar
- Love Lure
- The Man Behind the Curtain
- The Long Hand On the Pants Clock
- The Lone Ranger
- Denim Ferret
- Gorilla Vine
- Sushi Roll
- Wii-Mote
- Tremble Tumor
- My Fleshy Friend
- Strawberry Ice Cream Cone
- Didjeri-Don’t
- Cougar Rifle
- Christmas Ornaments
- Zamboni Bologna
- Commander In Jeans
- Quick-Scope
- The North Pole
- The Pen That Never Runs Out Of Ink
- Wickless Candle
- Flop-Handle
- The Little Bruce Willis That Lives In My Pants
- Messy Burrito
- Eye Of The Storm
- Crazy-Glue Spigot
- A Branch of the Man-Tree
- Pneumatic Navel Nudger
- Worlds Cheapest Bottle of Champagne
- Cat’s Tail
- Lotion Dispenser
- The Short Crutch
- Hibernating Bear
- Bulgy Buddy
- Defender of the City
- The South Pole
- Radio Tower
- Pants Muffler
- The Exactly-In-The-Middle Pole
- Fuzz Baton
- My Personal Stradovarious
- Ovary Observer
- The Thundering Overseer
- Lord of the Halls of Madness
- Angry Aardvark
- The Sappy Oak
- The Weeping Willow
- Jizzstick
- Cum-Breathing Dragon
- Syphilis Saber
- Monkey Fist
- Hammer of Dawn
- Bulgy Bugle
- Wrinkly Crutch
- Demon of the South Side
- Groin Ninja
- Buddy Buddha
- Volcano
- The Folly of Man
- Vagina Plug
- Light Saber
- One Nostril Nose Plug
- Spring Loaded Semen Sprayer
- Dickapult
- Trebuchet With Very Disconcerting Ammunition
- Snake With the Lazy Eye
- Respectable Gentleman
- Little Guy With the Least Fashionable Turtle-Neck Sweater of All Time
- Harbinger of the End Times
- Apollyon, Lord of Flies
- Crows Nest
- Wormtail
- Defiler of Many
- Big Floppy
- Slim Jim
- Sword of Michael
- Booty Bumper
- Cocktail Peanut
- Worlds Smallest Violin
- Bar of Kryptonite
- Lord Humongous
- Mad Max
- The Kingslayer
- You-Know-Who
- Guardian Angel With a Substance Abuse Problem
- Personal Baseball Bat
- Lord of Light
- Abominable Snowdick
- Professor XXX
- Butthole Bandit
- Space Needle
- Fury of the River
- Reason to Consult a Medical Professional
- Walking Stick
- Branch of Eternity
- A Bad Place to Shoot-Up Heroin
- Key to Your Dreams
- Friendly Downstairs Neighbor
- Binky
- Cave Troll
- Smeagol
- Zip-Code Extender
- Back Scratcher
- Proof God Has a Sense of Humor
- Stimulus Package
- Peacemaker
- The Frothy Frigate
- Edward Norton in “American History X“
- Pork Pawn
- Fuzz Nugget
- Bubble Blower
- USB Stick
- Herpes Hammer
- Pug Face
- Gash Diver
- The Troll of Thigh Valley
- Plaster Blaster
- Biscuit Brisket
- Rectal Wrecker
- Yoo-Hoo
- Vaginal Eviscerator
- Twat Fodder
- The Banana Cannon
- Catcher In the Snatch
- Throat Cork
- Needler
- Cunt Cockula
- Fappling Gun
- Quelaags Fury Sword
- The Blister Pistol
- The Mommy Maker
- Pull Up Bar
- The Juicer
- Splooge McDuck
- Dragon’s Tooth
- Bone Club
- Boner-rang
- Pussy Pulverizer
- Snatch Ratchet
- The Alien
- Wife Gagger
- Pink Xenomorph
- The White Whale of the Denim Seas
- Black Mamba
- Cinnamon Stick
- The Colonels Drumstick
- The Human Centipede
- Butt Snake
- The Horn of Gondor
- The Yeast Feaster
- Wild Hog
- Khal Drogo
- The Tree of Life
- Man Root
- Fruit Bearer
- The Tree of Forbidden Fruit
- The Grand Slamwich
- Carpet Cleaner
- Mount Doom
- Pinkey and the Brain
- Fuck Maker
- He-Who-Shall-Not-Be Named
- Clam Skewer
- Sour Creme Production Facility
- Angler Dangler
- Highway to the Danger Zone
- The Septapalegic Octopus
- Pillar of Awesome
- Flayer of Mortals
- Beanie Baby
- Snowpiercer
- Aux Cord
- Duck Call
- Thunderous Tootsie-Roll
- Personal “On” Switch
- Weeping Monkey
- Worlds Least Appropriate Crucifix
- Face Blaster
- Tongue Twister
- Steve Buscemi’s Face
- The Jowliest Old Man
- Pants Politician
- Pocket Jedi
- Number One Pencil
- Gobble Throttle
- Fuck Loaf
- A Tastier Fruit Cake
- A Classy Institution
- Mayonnaise Pipeline
- The Mainline To Dirty-Town
- An Incomplete Hula-Hoop
- Butt Scratcher
- Flesh-Zeppelin
- Eye Piercer
- Slippy
- Period Plugger
- Escape Rope
- Booty Rattle
- The Ol’ “S” Hook
- Pearl Necklace Provider
- Fist of Fury
- Groin Graboid
- The Eternal Eviscerator
- An Unconvincing Mustache
- Hammer of God
- Sploogy Sharpshooter
- A Whole Lump of Regret
- Baby-Batter-Blaster
- Angel of Awesome
- Gonorrhea Giver
- Bearded Logger
- Creature of the Night
- Impractical Paintbrush
- Love Belcher
- Pork Spatula
- The Star Spangled Banger
- The Juice Crew
- Fur Blimp
- Hooker Hammer
- Grounds For Divorce
- Jericho Missile
- Cinnamon Biscuit
- Tapioca Tap
- Problem For the Local Zoning Commission
- Trouser Tsunami
- Rip-Chord
- Parental Distillery
- Crash Course In Bad Decisions
- Greasy Gator
- Beefeater
- Sperm Spraying Whale
- Fire Spout
- Pleasure Gavel
- Zipper Constrictor
- No-Knuckle Pants Finger
- Bigfoot
- Smelly Dwarf
- Yellow Wine Dispenser
- Furious Downstairs Neighbor
- Crisco Stick
- Derier Defiler
- Mayor of Pants City
- Liquid Almost-Baby Faucet
- Ham Tube
- Jimmy-Jam
- Below the Belt Bacon Beast
- Long Pig
- Rocket-Top Bottle
- Tongue Tester
- Baby-Making Bop-It
- Giggle Handle
- Manly Shrub-Hub
- The Actual Shocker
- Sticky Taser
- Personal Piglet
- Hairy Houdini
- Throb Fairy
- Colonel Crotchy, Commander of the Southern Armies
- Ocarina of Slime
- Shifty Wrinkle-Demon
- Road to Pleasure
- Goal-Post
- Corpse Defiler
- Filthy Fornicator
- Small-Bore Rifle
- Large Bore Rifle
- Just Mind Bogglingly Girthy-Bore Rifle
- The Larger Hand On Big Ben’s Clock
- Meaty Bubble-Wand
- Pork-Stalk
- Chairman Of the Questionable Decisions Comity
- Commander Rod
- Drippy Puffer-Fish
- Deep Personal-Space Probe
- A Coke Bottle Just Waiting For the Mentos
- Jimmy Dean Reject
- Jean Steak
- A Less Majestic Comet
- Glory Gun
- The Reason I Come Up With Shortcuts That Keep Us Away From Elementary Schools
- Hairy How-Do-You-Do
- The Hive Mind
- General Throb
- Worldstomper
- Very Hot Topic
- Juicy Man Steak
- Batter Ram
- Vomitous Mass
- Mossy Sea Slug
- Serpentine Surprise
- Two-Direction Compass
- Squish Sword
- Weepy Cobra
- Squirm-Handle
- Fleshy Iceberg
- A Rocket Ship to Destiny
- The Brittlest Bone
- Toxic Tourniquet
- Vagina Monster
- Lusty Love Lance
- Mega Shark
- The Whitest Walker
- Glorious Peoples Leader
- Mystery Meat
- Conquerer of the Marshes
- Key to the End Times
- Brobdingnagian Bulge
- Ranger Regret
- The Faceless Man
- Canyon Crasher
- The Littlest Gentleman
- Limited Depth Drilling Apparatus
- Big Beefy Bastard
- Romance Rod
- Tunnel Snake
- Connection to God
- Worlds Shortest Fishing Pole
- All-Star Breakfast
- Frothy Flotilla
- Syrupy Cylinder Waffle
- Phantom of the Opera In Your Pants
- Wiggle Finger
- The Fast
- The Furious
- Apple On A Short Branch
- Temporary Vaginal Piercing
- Doctor Howler
- Rump Plug
- Future Destroyer
- Gargle Gargoyle
- Eye of the Pleasure-Storm
- Penis
Whether you’re a fan of ‘Captain Winky’ or more of a ‘Mr. Sniffles’ lover, the world of phallic pseudonyms is vast and varied. But hey, why stop at a mere 1000? Let’s make the internet even weirder, one nickname at a time. So, help me out, drop your own hilarious, eyebrow-raising, or just plain bizarre names in the comments below. Let’s see what you got! ??
I noticed there was a name missing from your list…”Hairy-crescent-roll”?? LMFAO ????
What about, “dome-headed bushmaster”?